Thoughts on using "and" instead of "but"

I dunno about you but this continued isolation has really helped me hone my superpower of overthinking stuff. Thus, recently I have been pondering the use of “and” in lieu of “but.” Like many, I have been in the habit of using “but” when communicating two seemingly opposite or conflicting descriptors. For example, “I am confident but unsure.” 

“But” seems to be a bit argumentative; it is frequently used to make a counterpoint in a discussion. I think that opposition factor in “but” has become a big part of its identity – at least in the subconscious. Even the sound of the word – the two hard sounding consonants on either end – has one bracing. “But” implies a binary choice.

Humans are not that simple. We are not one or the other. We are “and.”  The inclusiveness of “and” is just far more accurate.

• I am happy and struggling.

• I am tired and energized.

• I am grieving and healing.

• I am content and curious.

So, I have started replacing the word but with the word and, as I work through stuff. “And” is empowering in all the best ways. Further, if I am going to grant that inclusive complexity to myself, I will give it to others as I listen and try to understand their thoughts, positions, and feelings that may be new to me or different from my own. Replacing “but” with “and” is helping me connect with others more effectively. 

Do not even get me started on “and also,” and we’ll save “yet” for another time. 😉