End-of-Life Preparation

Certainty – what we wouldn’t give for it? In our day-to-day lives we strive for certainty, when we: confirm dates and times, read product reviews, obtain trusted referrals, guide our kids to apply to a shoo-in college, save for a rainy day, listen to our gut, and sometimes cross our fingers.

Yet, there are three absolute, 100% sure things; we remain illiterate about. This illiteracy is costing us a lot of money and even more moral distress and emotional capital.

The three certainties are:

  1. At the end of life comes death.

  2. There are no do-overs in end of life.

  3. Changed forever, surviving loved ones remain and remember.

Two out of three adults in the US do not have adequate end-of-life documents. There is no statistically significant difference in this data point based on age or socio-economic status.

One of the greatest gifts you can give someone you love is to talk with them about what you want at the end of your life, for the disposition of your remains, and property and to put it all together in clear, legal documentation.

It is easiest to start this process when everyone is well. I recommend 18-year-olds document their advance healthcare directives and designate a healthcare proxy and alternate.  I encourage couples who are marrying or recently married to have conversations about their end of life wishes, share access to accounts and devices, and create legal documents such as a trust and will.

The average age of a widow is only 59. Perhaps one of the saddest scenarios I encounter at least once a week, in the widows’ groups I belong to is a partner who has died and the surviving loved ones do not have the access code to their smart phone and they have not designated a legacy contact.  This means that all the contacts, photos, and videos that became infinitely more precious at the instant of death are not available to the surviving loved ones.

I have created a free download called the At Peace Toolkit to help you work through a comprehensive end-of-life plan and start conversations with loved ones so that they can do the same.

At Peace Toolkit

The At Peace Toolkit is your guide to being at peace with end of life. This expansive packet walks you through setting up the medical ID on your smartphone, establishing your advance healthcare directives, organizing administrative details, and starting conversations with loved ones.