Introducing Memento Mori

“I’m not gonna lie,” (that’s a Southern expression that braces the reader, more often the listener, for a confession, revelation, declaration or some combination thereof).  Anyway, I’m not gonna lie, making, keeping, renewing and perhaps letting go of connections with others is at the core of so much for this childless, widow in an age of isolation. 

As I navigate my aloneness, I am making some interesting connectedness discoveries.  Thus far, these discoveries are falling into three types:

1) People I was close with and saw frequently, but in light of, or perhaps because of COVID-19 and isolation, have become distant. 

I am not taking much action on this at this point.  A wait-and-see approach seems the most prudent to preserve a relationship that may just be going through a rough patch.  After all, everyone is adjusting and struggling with our individual and collective situations.  We are all in the same storm, but different boats and we truly cannot know the ways in which someone else, even someone we thought we knew well, is feeling challenged.  I try to send periodic messages of connection without any expectation of a response.

2) Long dormant connections that have been awakened and enriched by the new reality of fewer activities and more time for long, meaningful video and telephone conversations that I cherish.

3) New yet already profound connections that I can categorize as friendships, despite never having been in their immediate proximity.

These are people I met via video meeting, have developed relationships with, joyfully anticipate visiting with again, and want to continue to get to know better.  Also, in this third category is my pen pal, whom I’d met prior to the lock down but I certainly did not know as I do now, that we have exchanged long email missives each week.

I hope you're also making, keeping, and renewing connections right now. And maybe letting go of a few.